Monday, August 31, 2009

I've been kinda quiet

Dealing with things. Inwardly. I'm doing...ok.

It's a busy time of year. Kids back in school. Orientation for BigB. I won't be going to school this year. Not right now anyway. Tough decision but it will be fine. I can be with my kids.

I am also in the middle of a very busy three week stretch of weddings, special services at church (which were great) and my last three weeks of working here at ECIP. I do need to find a morning only job, so I will be doing that in the next few days as well.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Jush tah lek you know

Ah put way to mush peanud budder on ma sanwishch.

Pleass God, don' lek dah phone wing! Thanssss

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Just ask me...

Go ahead.

Just ask me.

Am I just as organized at the launch of this school year as I was last?

Am I?


Let's all shout out the answer with a resounding...

...NO!!!! Nuh uh! No way, Man! Not even close. Not even a little.

It's 11:48 and I am just crawling into bed after completing 2 1/2 lunches (I'll finish mine tomorrow; I don't want day old tuna) and 1 snack. I scoured our "office supply" box to see what I did have to send Jellybean for supplies and came up with 2 blue pens and 3 pencils to go along with her new binder and 2 new folders.

The Boy Scouts will surely take away my badges and all. You now, if had badges...or was ever a boy scout...

Next week will be better. I just know it!

Monday, August 24, 2009

Looking to the Future

Well, the not-so distant future. Our son-in-law will be coming to school in town here soon and we are looking forward to being able to have him over for supper every once in a while. It will be nice; we miss him ('them' but 'they' will not be here just 'him'). Jellybean and Bug will be excited for that to happen too.

Friday, August 21, 2009

Beyond Repair

That's what she said. She feels she is "beyond repair". I have news for her, for you all. No one is EVER beyond repair.

He repaired me and I was in a very dark place in my life. God came and poured His oil & wine into my life; He picked me up from the ditches where robbers had beaten me and left me for dead (parable of the Good Samaritan), and He cared for me, fixed me up.

None of us are beyond repair. He fixed a girl who didn't care if she lived or died, who drank way too much, who hung out with people who would either protect her or kill her, who felt completely unworthy of her very next breath. Yet she continued to breath because she loved her daughter and knew she had to fight for her. He fixed a girl who ran out on her dad and her brother and sister, and then her mom and step-dad, who struck out at everyone who came near like she was a King Cobra, who felt worthless and broken. He repaired a girl who had so much life taken from her, she decided to give the rest of it away just so it would hurt just that little bit less.

He repaired a girl who had lost her joy, her hope, her purpose, her destiny, her spirit and her ability to love all (but that beautiful blonde reason for living that God had blessed her with). He fixed that. He restored those things unto me.

I am broken again but I know He will fix me. He is the potter and I am the clay. The words from ColdPlay's song "Fix You" keeps coming to mind - only I am not the fixer; I am the one to be fixed.

He can fix you too. You. Are. Not. Beyond. Repair!

Thursday, August 20, 2009

How Do I Taste, Moby?

The evening of August 18 BigB & I watched a movie with Rush, Finding Nemo to be exact. She knows ALL the words; she can recite them perfectly even without the movie playing. It sparked some interesting conversation.

→ Rush wants to be able to sit in the mouth of a Blue Whale but only if it won't eat her. Why? So she can say "How do I tast, Moby?! Huh?".
→ This lead to a conversation about how horrible it would be to be swallowed by a whale and die due to digestion.
→ She wants to be able to eat Blow Fish because one wrong cut or mistake during cooking and it "could" kill her; she thinks that would be a thrill. However, she thinks people who play Russian Roulette are idiots. Odd...
→ She wants a salt water tank with all the main characters from Finding Nemo.
→ She named the log in her terrarium "Logwannahawkaloogie".
→ She thinks it would be great to have an animal that "could eat me walk past me, as long as they can't see me so they can't eat me."
→ Rush's comment on Darla (the dentist's niece on Finding Nemo), "If she keeps killing fish, why get her a new one? Why not buy her a hamster?"
→ Quote from Rush, "I'd like to go sliding with the Polar Bears...if they can't see me. I could wear a polar bear costume!"
→ She thinks that the babies Marlon and Dory would have, if they were to have babies, would be very cute. She imagines them orange with blue stripes. "Can you breed fish?! Here, you guys, now have babies!"

But, I think the most memorable thing I got from that movie came in a quote from the movie itself (not that I like it being memorable or anything)
"Of course I like you; it's because I like you that I can't be with you."

I certainly do love my Nemo loving, Nemo quoting girl - more than she knows and more than I ever thought I could ever love...

Excuse me. Is my head on straight?

It feels like it isn't.

It took a few motrin to get me to sleep last night.

I can't think, or focus, or smile.

I'm trying. To smile, that is.

I'm trying. To think straight, that is.

So. If you would be so kind, can you tell me when I haven't put my head on straight? I need to adjust to a new normal that I don't like. one. little. bit. It sort of feels like open heart surgery without the anesthetic (not that I have had open heart surgery with or without it).

I am turning to God for strength but I think there may be road construction or something, as there seems to be a bit of a delay.

Monday, August 17, 2009

So...? This is what it's like living with boys...

Jellybean & Bug came running out of the bathroom, toothbrushes in hand, laughing like hyenas. Through squeals of delight Jellybean finally managed to squeak out that Bug had just drank from the toilet.

As BigB tried to explain to him how disgusting and unsafe that is, he told Bug that some people have even died from the germs found in toilets.

Bugs response?

In 20 days? They die if they do it for 20 days?

After reassuring Bug that he didn't mean he would die. Bug sprinted back off to the bathroom, where we encouraged him to brush his teeth AND use listerine!

So, can anyone seriously tell me why burping, farting, and, now, drinking toilet water (oh and let's not forget licking toilets) are so incredibly funny?

Earlier tonight, one of the family members passed gas and Bug says "If there were a trophy for worst farts, you would get it! You have the worst farts in the universe!". He then proceded to laugh to the point where we thought he may actually pee his pants.

Boys! What a strange species...

I 'Twit'

Yes, I do and yes, I did. I 'twit'. I didn't twit as in 'twit'; I twit, as in the other day Bug asked me if I had "twit" my job yet since Daddy got his new job.

The answer is, yes, I did just "twit". I will need to make a bit of money but I will only work in the mornings - unless BigB & I decide that I will take in 2 or 3 children and babysit.

Regardless, I get to be home with Bug in the afternoons; I get to be home when the girls get home from school. Heck, I even get to pick them up! I can take care of my children the way I want to! This makes me uber happy! I can't even begin to describe how happy I am. I'm all this is too good to be true but then I'm all oh no it isn't! I have waited SO long to get to this point!

So there you have it; I twit! I am a twitter. And although I could mean this, what I actually mean is this

Not Me Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

It is most certainly Not Me who has discovered that raising a child truly does mean your heart is not your own, and sometimes you will see your heart walk around you not knowing where it will go, who it will see or if it will come back in one piece. It is Not Me who has learned that THAT is the most tired you will ever be. I always thought that it was the sleepless nights of waking babies and breastfeeding...It's Not Me who was completely wrong.

It is Not Me who wrote an incredibly depressing Not Me and deleted most of it. It is Not Me who is not going to air this "basket of dirty laundry" right now. Therefore, it is Not Me who is asking you to remember our family in prayer, to ask for strength and wisdom. It is Not Me who is asking you to lift our hands...It is, then, Not Me who is moving on to better things to focus on.

It is Not Me who got to go to a neighboring city with 3 of my fantastic kids and my wonderful husband, and enjoy a day of shopping and eating. It was Not Me then, who found a great deal on a new dress coat and a lovely orange, silk shirt. It is Not Me who went to Lush and bought a great sugar scrub and has a wish list for the next time I go there; it is also Not Me who took my 8 year old daughter in with me and have created a monster - she has her own wish list; she is the girliest of girls that I know.

It is most definitely Not Me who is sitting here watching a spider crawl over my printer, trying not to SCREAM. LIKE. A. GIRL and wondering if I should find something to squish it (even though it has done nothing to me) or leave it (since it has done nothing to me). Friends, I am torn...

Friday, August 14, 2009

Rockin' the Pixie.

Jellybean has wanted her hair cut to "her ears" for quite a long time and we were never brave enough to let her do it. We thought that she would regret it the minute it was done so, we compromised and each time when a bit shorter and a bit shorter. She needed a haircut a week ago and so, when posed with the question of what she wanted I was again greeted by the "to my ears" comment.

This is what she looked like pre-haircut (with her most favorite doll, Watoto, a well loved doll Jellybean has lugged around since she was 3 years old).

Yes, we are in McDonalds. It was a bit before we could get in to her appointment so, we went for a drink and a rest; we had walked and Jellybean & Bug were quite vocal about their sore feet. (Good thing they weren't around when that was the only way Rush & I could get around, heh, Rush?)

At this point, I think I stopped breathing for a few minutes. It was a LOT to take in and a BIG change. The hair stylist and I thought that, perhaps, Jellybean's vocal button was released as more hair came off because the less hair there was the more talking ensued. I don't know how many times I had to ask her to please stop talking so the girl wouldn't make a mistake she couldn't fix (due to lack of hair). Perhaps I am a hair stylists' worst nightmare - the parent who doesn't like this much change...)

Voila! The finished look. It has taken a lot to get used to; I mean, I "lost" Bug after getting his hair cut because I didn't recognize him and it was no where near this dramatic.

She wanted to look like Rihanna...I say she is the spitting image, wouldn't you? Only 8... and fairer... and blond... with blue eyes...spittin' image. (The funny thing is, she doesn't even know who Rihanna is; she just saw her picture in a hair magazine and said 'I want it to look like that'.)

Thursday, August 13, 2009

'It' has finally happened!

What 'it'? You mean you don't know? Seriously? You have no idea what I am talking about? Oh. Ok. Sit down, grab a coffee or a Dole tangerine sparkler, put your feet up and I will enlighten you.

For the last year or so I have really been struggling with this whole 'getting up, working all day, sending my kids to a sitter, relying on Rush to make supper' existance that I have been living.

Some of you will know (Facebook) but others still have no idea so, let me share my fabulous news with y'all!

BigB has, just today, signed the paperwork for a new job that is in town and a bit more than he was making before! (Can I get a hallah in da house?!) This means that I can change my hours here at work OR, if that isn't feesible, get a different job where I am only working mornings! No more sitters (except for maybe an hour during lunch)! I get to be home when my kids come home from school; in fact, I get to pick them up from school! I can have suppers made and snacks and clean my house and all those things that have been taunting me with my working full-time and having the schedule we do!

I am so excited by the possibilites BigB has with this new job, that I will have as a result of his new job and of the things that we can give to our children because of this new job! Thank you, God! You get ALL the credit on this; Your hand is through it all!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Meet our little friends...

Their new home...

Meet Fredrico and Rodriguez, the newest members of our family.

I haven't learned to like them yet but, I am getting a bit more adjusted to having them in my house, locked in Rush's room, under lock and key...

We, meaning Rush, bought their home on her birthday and they became official family members on Aug 9. (Rush has yet to really enjoy them as she left Monday to work at the group home - until Saturday. I have bravely been feeding them their crickets and spraying their home and, I have to admit I am getting used to them being long as they are in their terrarium. Still not too hot on the idea of touching them or having them loose (held by children) in my house but it will come.)

She sure is excited to have them; it has been a long wait for Rush. She has talked about having little guys like these for a few years now. Thanks for being so patient, baby.

Bug enjoying just watching the critters...

I am not sure if I really am going to enjoy the fact the Fredrico and Rodriguez are here as it has caused quite a ripple effect. Jellybean wants a corn snake, Bug a tarantula and BigB his own terrarium of reptiles, including one he needs a collar and leash for; yes, a bearded dragon or iguana of some sort. Not for this girl. Give me a dog, a horse, a cow, a buffalo...a rhinocerous even but please, for all that will leave me sane leave the reptiles, amphibions and arachnids out of THAT much of my home (she said somewhat jokingly).

Please welcome Fredrico and Rodriguez to our home and to our family. They will, from now on, be referred to as The Boys or The Critters.


Sometimes it makes life a heck of a lot more interesting to try not to do things the easy way.

Sometimes getting a running start at things makes doing things the hard way just that much more effective...

Sometimes God opens a window when you were thinking it would be a door and you may need to know how to step into a situation through that window...

Why not get that experience young? It keeps you versatile, ready, on your toes and giggling from somewhere near your toes.

Keep life interesting. Don't follow the crowd. Take the opportunity to make use of all the "openings" life presents you with...And laugh while you do it.

You're my Superman

Someone thinks her daddy is very, very special. Someone thinks her daddy is just like Superman.

Someone drew this very lovely picture for her daddy.

Our children should look to us as their role models. Why should we leave it to the teenybopper star of the week or the super hero of the year to be our children's role models? Have you not glanced at the covers of those rag mags while you are standing in line at the grocery store? Do you really want your children looking up to them?

Give your child a godly influence to model themselves after. Make your life a life they should and will want to be like. Show them, with your example, what and who we are to be like by being a living breathing example of Jesus to them. Don't leave it up to the flavour of the week to influence your sons and will only leave them heartbroken, discouraged, doubleminded and exasperated...

The Supper

Our present to Rush

Some of da family...

Grandma & Papa's present

a Chi hair straightener which led to her new haircut (which I don't have pictures of yet...)

Opening the present from Mom & Dad

Rush with her ring

Not all of the family was able to make it but, we sure did have fun with a couple sets of grandparents, an aunt and uncle and one cousin. We ate pizza, chips, with onion dip (thanks to our friend, Johnnie, for getting us addicted to that!), veggies, angel food cake, and punch, and we shared lots of stories from Rush's growing up (including some I had never heard from her visits with Grandma and Papa H).

Beautiful Girl

During my blogging hiatus Rush turned 16; we had a party. We went to the spa. We said we would be going again and again and again if we had the money for doing that sort of thing all the time, which we don't, so that was just a pipe dream.

On Aug 1 I took my baby girl (who is no longer a baby but a beautiful young lady) to the spa to celebrate. Following we had some family over for Dominoes pizza (at the birthday girl's request) and angel food cake with raspberries.
The food...

Can't go to the spa without chocolate! I mean seriously!

Aaaaahhhhh, relaxing...

Me & my girl! (I love you, darlin')

Dear Blog

I have ignored you the past little while. It hasn't been you; it's been me. No, really. I mean it.

You see, I was able to enjoy my daughter's Sweet 16 spa day and birthday supper, went with her to buy a home for her two new friends (you will meet them), walked my kids to get their hair cut (Jellybean looks VERY different), went to "The City" with a friend a couple times to help with wedding planning, went to my almost-sister's wedding shower (yay), heard that my brother wore a dress for his party, needed therapy after that and needed my brain cleaned - mental images and all (just kidding) and have been enjoying some incredible, life changing services at our church (Canadian Revival Center).

There has been a lot to take in with those sermons...a lot. Did I mention 'a lot'? They have changed our thinking and our perspective and our lives! It has been amazing!

Rush has been working just out of town since last Wednesday as well so, there has been a lot of driving back and forth and a lot of texting her; I miss her! She's a great kid! You would miss her too! She will be there until Friday and so, this week, is a week of driving out to get Jellybean and Bug each night (as well as taking them out there each morning before work). I am in charge of her new friends (you WILL meet them) and, this morning, I was perfectly at ease opening the door to their new home and taking care of all their needs, and for that, I am kind of proud of myself...