Thursday, August 23, 2007


Back to some normalcy. No more holidays. No more weddings and with it wedding chaos. No more, and I say this with sadness, summer. School starts for the kids on Tuesday, for me Sept 11. I only have one job right now and that feels weird; I took a leave of absence from BPs; there is a stress that is gone but it is noticably gone and it feels almost like a void right now. There is a full time health records position posted right now, ends Aug 27, that I applied for; if I get it, I know that I will not be returning to BPs.

I'm excited for this newfound "freedom" for lack of a better word but I find myself afraid of it too. Am I going to utilize my time better or am I going to get stuck in a rut of nothingness and find I have wasted it all away? Am I going to well at this Chem class or am I going to bellyflop off the high board? There is far too much uncertainty in that department right now. I will feel more at ease once in the class a bit, if I find I am able to do well in it.

I am finding that I need to make time for me and I know that that can be perceived as selfish however, I am finding that I don't do anything that is just for me. So last night I ordered prints form my 1000's of pictures and I am going to finish some scrapbooks that I started. LilB & Nat's wedding album. The kids' grad album and I now have P.B. & J's wedding album to do. After that I have tonnes more to do with just family pictures or baby pictures.

I also want to take time for myself to spend time with my frends. I am missing that from my life right now. Not only is it a void from my life but I find I am missing it and longing for it.

So the chaos and unorganized confusion of the summer is all but over and school lunches, homework, music lessons and dance recitals are back to routine. Whew.

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