Friday, August 03, 2007

14 years ago today

14 years ago today I was 18 years old, having laid in a hospital bed for a week during an incredible heatwave and was 198 pounds of mostly water retension and baby (having weighed 105 pounds before pregnancy). I had been in the hospital for so long prior baby as I developed hypertoxemia and was on the verge of being dangerously sick. Aug 2 my membranes were stripped and I was given Oxytocin.

14 years ago today, I was going to be having a baby. I had only been married for 3 weeks and was all ready realizing that my husband (not Bill) was not even remotely close to the man of my dreams having all ready abandoned me in this hospital and not really caring to see me. I was alone and I was scared.

My labour started and my "husband" was no where to be found. My dad and my brother were on their way from our hometown (2 hours away). Things began to progress and I was getting excited about the arrival of my precious baby. Not too much further into the day I failed to progress and an "emergency" c-section was ordered. I say "emergency" because it was ordered at noon and I got it at 11:33 that night.

I was given a spinal and strapped to the table where the c-section proceeded. I had to interupt the doctor as I was feeling EVERYTHING! He calmly told me I only felt the sensation to which I replied a bit loudly and vulgarly that I COULD FEEL EVERYTHING!!! The doctors quickly decided that the spinal must have missed its mark and they had to put me out with general anesthetic.

Much to my dismay I awoke to find I was the last person in my entire family to hold my beautiful daughter and when I did get to see her I was still so hopped up on drugs that I took that first glance, said how cute she was a passed back out again.

We have been through a lot that beautiful baby and I. We tried to stay with her dad and did our best for 3 years but through those 3 years came to the realization that we were safer on our own. We had a couple rocky years alone and survived and thrived and along came BigB.

I was just a kid when I had her but I am so thankful and so grateful that she came along. Today she is a smart, beautiful, talented, compassionate, thoughtful, giving, fun-loving, hilarious young lady and I couldn't be more proud of her. She is an angel to me and I will always, always cherish her!

1 comment:

Dixie said...

She's a great girl, like you say, so strong and compassionate, esp. given all she's been through. She's going to help so many people as she gets older. You should be very proud.