Wednesday, May 23, 2007

2 Years Old

This blog is 2 years old today and when I looked back on what I wrote 2 years ago today, it is as true then as it is now. I miss my Grandma K; I miss everything about her. This time of year especially; she loved this time of year...

I miss her a lot right now as I am going through school; she would tell my sister and I that we should be nurses. "The way you love to take care of things and people, you should be a nurse." I told her straight out that there was no way I would EVER want to be a nurse, apparently I didn't like anything to do with blood. So, my granny focused her "nursing" attention on my sister. She did go on and became a special care aid.

When I was in the hospital after having Bug something struck me in my quiet room...I want to be a nurse and deep down I think I have for a very long time. Since Bug was born I have been attempting to get my grade 12 math in some form or another through correspondence but I wasn't structured enough and had too many other things to focus on. Thus began my road to Adult Education, where I am now.

Every once in a while as I sit in class, I think of my granny and how I long to tell her that I am going to be a nurse just like she had hoped. I want to tell her because I know she would be so proud of me and because I want nothing more than for her to be proud of me and who I have become. I hadn't amounted to much around the time my granny died. I was on a downward spiral and I was going out of control fast. I only wish I had had my life straight so she could have been proud of me but I know that her thoughts of me, at the time of her death, were thoughts of fear and thoughts of desperation as she prayed for me. I just wish she could have seen those prayers answered...

1 comment:

Steph said...

She has Ang. I know she has. And your friends are proud of you too.